Studio: Shudder/RLJE Films
Director: Kurt Wimmer
Writer: Kurt Wimmer
Producer: Lucas Foster, Doug Barry, John Baldecchi
Stars: Elena Kampouris, Kate Moyer, Callan Mulvey, Bruce Spence, Stephen Hunter, Jayden McGinlay, Joe Klocek
Review Score:
Summary:
A teenager becomes a dying farm town’s last chance at survival when a vengeful girl leads the children in a deadly uprising.
Review:
It’s no secret why sequels and remakes reign supreme in cinema. It’s because producers are more willing to invest their money, and audiences are more willing to spend theirs, when people already recognize the property.
But you have to wonder what the true value of brand equity really is for many dead-horse horror properties. Sure, it’s easier to get a movie made, marketed, and distributed when someone can say, “Oh, Amityville? I know what that is!” Except how many of those memories then stop to think, “When was the last time that franchise had a ‘good’ movie and how many viewers will actually watch a new one just because they know the name?”
Current case in point: “Children of the Corn.” Since Stephen King’s seminal short story was originally published in 1977, there have been theatrical movies, a TV remake, and enough direct-to-video sequels to ensure everyone everywhere still knows what “Children of the Corn” is, even after six decades. Yet too many of those films range from bad to very bad, making for a name horror fans associate with a mediocre-at-best track record. Consequently, that crowd of aware viewers goes into “Children of the Corn” movies with subterranean expectations, and rightly so given the title’s tarnished reputation.
Regarding reputations, readers who know mine for being a harsher-than-most critic might come here expecting another dismissive review for the dogpile demanding that writer/director Kurt Wimmer’s 2020 version of “Children of the Corn” be banished to the trash bin. Instead, they’re now wondering, “What gives with the three-star score?”
Believe me, I’m the last person who expected to find me defending a widely derided “Children of the Corn” movie as “not that bad,” even “decent.” Obviously, the words within those quotation marks aren’t electrifying endorsements that anyone associated with the film would be eager to repeat from the rooftops. But it’s genuinely unfair for mainstream media columns to reductively refer to this remake as “unwatchable” and “lazy” when the film is, on a purely objective level, neither of those things.
First, let’s address supposed laziness. Kurt Wimmer has come, arguably fallen, a long way since his work on major studio pictures that include remakes of “Point Break” and “Total Recall.” Regardless of where he was versus where he is now, Wimmer is still a filmmaker experienced in creating high-grade productions, and here, his crew applies that same level of polish as best as a lower budget will allow.
This “Children of the Corn” movie is put together better than most “Children of the Corn” movies. Experienced actors exhibit earnest effort. Locations and faces are properly lit. A consistent musical score accurately complements mood. Camera setups collect coverage from multiple angles so editing can acquire visual rhythms. Sparingly used VFX don’t immediately scream “cheap.”
In short, this movie doesn’t look like anyone’s first rodeo. And when you’re regularly immersed in an indie horror world overrun with amateurs recording slapdash footage on cellphones in their basements and backyards, you know that true professionalism makes a big difference in how watchable something is.
Now that we’re on that point, “Children of the Corn” is not nearly as hollow as predominantly negative reviews claim. The story, about an evil little girl leading a revolt against a small town’s adults while a teenager tries to stop her, incorporates a variety of arcs involving farm industry economics, local politics, law enforcement scandals, sibling rivalries, domestic dramas like divorce and child abuse, and coming-of-age wanderlust.
Whether any of those themes make for an engaging horror film, specifically a “Children of the Corn” film, may be a different topic altogether. While the script stirs all of those elements into the pot, the primary flavor of fright gets lost in the mixture as “Children of the Corn’s” first 40 minutes get hung up on establishing events that aren’t exactly exciting, and background bits that aren’t exactly important.
Certain points of the plot demand more than a dollop of disbelief suspension (This tiny town has almost 20 orphans in its children’s home?). Some beats go absolutely nowhere (What does it matter that heroine Bo’s parents are dealing with the end of their marriage?). Other beats are tonally strange (Bo and her brother really have to handcuff their parents to force them to attend a meeting, and they are ok with that?).
What “Children of the Corn” does have, however, is creepy kids, a cornstalk creature, fiery explosions, chases, a few gruesome kills that tear out one man’s eyeballs and tear another woman in two, and a clear plot. Those may seem like essential ingredients for horror entertainment, because they are, although some “Children of the Corn” films have neglected to include them.
Allow me to take the questions out of parentheses and pose some likely ones regarding whether or not this “Children of the Corn” is ultimately worth a watch. Some simple yes or no answers may make up your mind, or reframe an opinion that’s already formed.
Is this the worst “Children of the Corn” movie ever? Not even close. Is it in the bottom half of the dozen or so “Children of the Corn” movies that already exist? I don’t think so. But is it on par with a majority of indie horror movies merely meant to engage your attention for 90 minutes and nothing more? I do think so, and that item alone separates this comparative wheat from the plentiful “Children of the Corn” chaff. Maybe that’s not saying much, but “not much” can say a lot when we’re talking about a title that isn’t worth what it used to be anyway.
Review Score: 60
“Kraven the Hunter” might as well be renamed “Kraven the Explainer,” as it’s much more of an unnecessarily tedious origin story than an action-intensive adventure.